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17 September 2012

Merging

Life is pretty sweet now that I am a married person. Life is very different. I can relax in ways I never before relaxed and I worry about things I never deemed worthy of my fret.What a strange person this married me is!

I took a break from my personal education so I can master the fine art of pleasing my man.  Taking time away from my ambitions is something I would have never considered until I felt in love with my Mennonite Boy. In fact, since being married I find myself doing a couple of things I "never thought I would do":

I Never Thought I Would:
1. Be completely and hopeless in love.  I always thought women who need the man in their lives seriously need help. I thought they were spineless, thoughtless twits that allowed themselves to be tramped. I thought the woman that loved a man so much that she allowed her life be ran by her man were in need of some external locus, I thought they needed some sort of validation, had no purpose of their own.  I thought that love was right when it didn't rob a person of their identity. I thought it was a comfortable partnership. How wrong I was!  I hopeless love my Beloved!  I love doing things for him, even if it means wasting a whole day of my time being his "side man" or sitting there talking to him while he does a job. I love doing things with him and for him.  I even enjoy cooking, just to watch him eat my food with relish and delight.  I stop what I am doing when he comes home just to meet him at the door with a kiss.

2.  Be jobless: Well, to be honest, I am not completely jobless, since I work a couple hours at local school working with some of the children who have special needs, but I am basically jobless.  My mother always warned me about being financially dependent on a man. 'Things happen" she said and if I was too dependent on a man, things would happen harder. Financial independence was a safety net against things happening against me.

3. Put my plans on pause.  Wait! I have things I need to do.  I have list of dreams that I need to do and place s I need to get to!  I need to go to California and spend some family time with my aunts and cousins.  I need to look long and hard at the dogwood flowers and read a book under the Red Wood Trees.  I need to eat something interesting and ride a plane.  After that, I need to gather my money and go see the world! Ride a ship! Ski! Ride a Train! Oi! the things I need to do!  What am I doing sitting around here?  Oh, yes, I am loving my man!

4. Take a break from School.  Me never!  I am studying with a purpose. I would never take a break for a man! You must be crazy.

5. Stop being culturally sensitive. When I am in Rome, I do as the Romans.  When I am in the Mennonite Community,  dress appropriately, keep my opinions about racial and gender biases to myself, and respect the fact that most of these farmer people choice not to further their education past primary level. Now that I am a part of the community things are different.  I am here!


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