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25 March 2009

Buses, buddies and memories

Ok so before Leo thinks I am in the US (oops! Too late!) and Dom write me off all together, I better post. Ihave been very busy lately but I have been very good at managing it. The End of the Street is getting managed in there too, even if things appear other wise.

About this post. I took my mother to Chets the other day (wait that was more than two weeks ago). She flew from Cancun by herself which I thinks is pretty brave. Going through Mexico by English only speaking self is quite a fet. I had car trouble the day before she left and because she had luggage and and has trouble with her hip I took the bus up to Chetumal, Mexico with her. It meant I had to miss a whole day of school rather then just a few hours. The trip was LONG! I don't know how my friends from Orange can just jump on the bus and come done to Cayo.

I mused on two things most of the trip. One was the fact tht I am getting responsible. Being responsible cost a lot and hurts sometimes. I was really hurt in my heart when I was in OW walking around Leo's park waiting for the bus to take off again. I almost cried like the spoiled baby I was when I saw his water tower, the clock down town. I thought about Tracy, when I saw the ladies in the park with their children. My heart jumped when I saw a hotel that looks like it might be Helwa's. I thought about how two years ago, if I was in Orange Walk or anywhere that friends of mine might be I would careless and stop in to seem them. I wold even make myself at home for a week! I have changed a lot. I don't so much that I used to. I am not scared of the person that I am becoming and most of the time I am thrilled that I am growing up finally, but while I was on that bus I was broken hearted. I was finally in OW and I couldn't stop in.

I got home at 9 am. I took a shower and went to bed. The next morning I got up, made my bed, ate breakfast and went to work. For the last two weeks I have been a big woman with a house adn three dogs. I have two vehicles to take care of (Mom's car and my scooter). I take care of the garden and water the flowers. Eat Mom's veggie and cook my own food. I am good at it so far. I miss the carefree days of Sixth Form when I could hang with my friends without regards to a clock but I am also glad those days are over. I miss my buddies and stuff but I am also glad I have a pay check. I am glad that I can help my mom, pay a tithe, be a pillar.

The next question is, how am I being a pillar to? A lot of people have asked me why I haven't been around... It makes me realize that I have much to do when time manage comes around. I think my friends are starting to question how much I care for them. I have been a very dedicated person. I used to be dedicated to my relationships but now they are getting crowded out. I am learning now that things grow at different rates. I can't invest in everything as much as I want, but I can work at things little at a time. Give a little here and a little there.

I want to write more about this but I have to ran.... things are screaming at me for attention....

1 comment:

Leonardo Melendez said...

Okay, I'm going to say it...this post makes me emotional. You were here?! You take care of the garden?! You eat your own veggies, alone?! Nostalgic :( Wish you the best, even if my face doesn't say it when we cross paths.